Parenting is Paved with Good Intentions
Published Sept. 24, 2006
“Mom, Grace’s birthday party is next week,” my eight year-old says as we pass the toy aisle
at Target, “could we PLEASE buy a present now instead of waiting to buy one on the way to the
party like usual.”
I just hate it when my kids point out my imperfections.
Yes, I procrastinate. But it’s not because I’m lazy, it’s because I don’t like to work if I don’t
have to. Oh, wait, I do see the similarities.
I agreed with my daughter that it was a fabulous idea to buy a present a week early,
especially because we were already at the store and since it wasn’t on my list (oh, who am I
kidding? I didn’t have a list), I would have never thought of it had my daughter not brought it up.
There’s a part of me that always thought I would be the World’s Best Mom, teaching my kids
the art of homemade crafts and being on time. But then birthday parties (or some other
reminders) come along and I realize, alas, I am not the World’s Best. Not today anyway; but
there’s always tomorrow.
If only I could convince the world that my good intentions are actually quite good. For
instance, I wish my son knew that I had the perfect birthday gift picked out in my mind but by the
time his birthday rolled along I’d forgotten what it was and when he opened his gifts I quietly
chastised myself and whispered to my husband, “I forgot the panini grill!” I wish the
congratulations card for my aunt and uncle’s 50th wedding anniversary wasn’t still sitting on my
desk a month after their party waiting for me to locate their mailing address. And I wish people
knew how often I think of them --wondering how their family is doing or if they ever got that mole
on their thigh checked out.
My mind is filled with not just good intentions, but great ones. Great, magnanimous plans for
keeping in touch, celebrating the little things, offering friendship. But then I get busy. Or lazy,
you be the judge. And I wind up buying a gift on the way to the party, settling for something at
the local pharmacy that has “you” written all over it. I actually thought this was the reason
decorative gift bags were invented. So people like me could purchase a present, tissue paper
and a gift bag all in one stop en route to the soiree.
But, today, I am a different woman. Today I will shop with my daughter and purchase a gift
one week in advance, wrap it and tie it with a proper bow. The present will sit, beautifully
wrapped and ready on the kitchen counter for a full week for us to admire and praise ourselves
for our punctual purchase.
I guess that’s what happens to parents when our children’s good intentions collide with our
own. We become for a moment the parent we want to be. World’s Best Mom – for today.